mizzhaily

goes

Red

and

ALiVe

patience to enlightenment

oh yeah
we did a very long talk
im still not so sure however
if we will be thoroughly solid
becoz
this sunday
is going to be one hell of a waiting day
the day i dont wanna know the outcomes
i hate to leave
and leaving with a thinking that he might be taken away
is so unacceptable to let go
i can take it now without anyone else involve
but
i cant embrace it if these people
come up with something
that
i cant accept...
how to?
is this the fate of my life?
can someone be forced to do things they dont wanna do?
can anyone get the things they want really badly?
why cant i be that someone who could preserve the whole that i love??
things used to turn out the way i actually wanted it to be
they way i've been asking for so long
so so long
and
when i got it,
little did i know how im about to lose my grip
i hate thinking about the future
i dont want to wait for the future
future will suck a whole lot
...
anyway,
been wanting to do a double date
with sabby and izhar
i think ar sab
go for the fireman la
and NOOOO
its not because we're both dating men in the same uniform
please...
becoz i think rite
matboy
he's not really a truthful person as it seems
he can just disappear whenever he wants to
and cook up some ass shit excuses
so you'll believe him
he's done it once
trust me,
he'll do it again
and throw you into the WHAT-HAVE-I-DONE-question
there's seriously nothing wrong with you and your looks
its just them
dont jeopardise yourself,girl
im not saying stay the hell away from him
i just want you to be hell well cautious
of
bastards
ORAIT?!!!
you know i'll always be there for you
im just a phonecall away
love ya loads loads loads!!
...
hmm...something to deliberate
i havent been myself lately
for the 2 weeks i was werking and schooling
both full-time
i was exhausted
i have ALOT in my mind
i didnt talk much
i wasnt the laser-mouth sue
i wasnt the sarcastic bitch
i wasnt wad others think im suppose to be
i am now the very conservative and quiet little girl
hehe
i keep to myself most of the time
ALL THE TIME
heh!
Dali and Wan will be damned to see me so damn quiet!
but they're both in NS now!
too bad...
i think joing the SPDJ would bring my wild side up on the surface
well...
during the interview,
i felt so welcome
and
so comfortable
I HOPE I GOT A PLACE
and
lose
$200
haha...
hmmm....

14:51

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