wakey-wakey!
my gosh...
wad an asshole
wad a fucking bastard
wad did i do??
whatever it is
i am not gonna let you get in my way
i got school to tink abt
thinking about u doesnt always make me happy
most of the time i'd be thinking
of how long this happiness is going to last
i have always been insecure
becoz i knew
diz will come again
and
you will hurt me time and time again
i should haf listened to Ida
i knew all along how right she is
but
i took a gamble
risk being hurt again
trying to believe
that maybe this time
you will make this right
and im so wrong
i keep telling myself
i dont deserve someone like you
honestly,
im a good person
i gave you so many chances
i hate myself for doing this to myself
for being so fucking stupid
each time believing you will not do this to me again
even though i ignored my insecurities
this is the last straw
i wanted to be strong
and thats what i will be
this is going to be over for me now
its time for me to do myself a favour
and stop being stupid
i cant have myself vulnerable to being hurt
again and again
i can live without you
i have always been independent
with or without you
i am never going to wait for you ever again
i've spared myself too much hope
i wont live long
so i wont spend the rest of my life giving chance to bastards like you
i rather spend it
knowing what a fucking asshole you are
so here's another finger for you
...
school has been tiring
the late nights are nothing compared to working in night life
at least i knew i work my ass off
for something better
and for my future
rather than i spend my nights at work
thinking
what the hell im doing with my life
now i can think about
what i will do with my life
im back to school now (and i made it without you)
it has been 2 months or so?
yeah maybe
and by this time we know who to group with and who NOT to group with
all i know is
I JUST WANT TO WORK ALONE
i work better that way anyway
i give quality work
and doing it alone give me the satisfaction of my own hard work
i hate group projects
...
ouhkay i tink i will go to sleep now
will be meeting sab for a Sentosa trip
to just chill out
just the 2 of us
it has always been great being with you, Sabby
...
OH!OH!
i was doing my work in school at one of the study benches the other day
and this guy approached me
and say that his friend wants to get to know me
i looked over to his friend (ouuuhkaay..his friend=pretty boy=definite cutie)
they were there all along i was there actually
i just naturally never notice people
i smiled and politely shook my head
(at that time i didnt know i was just being a stupid loyal bitch to an asshole)
"Huh? Why?" The friend asked, surprised that i just rejected his pretty friend then it came to him that i might be attached and then he went,"OH oook!So..wads your name?"
"Sue." the only thing i said throughout the whole conversation
then he walked back to his friend
straight away,i packed my laptop and my stuffs
and went home
earlier than expected
haha! i cant stand being in front of him after that..
a few days later,i bumped into that pretty boy
in
the
LRT
I felt like U-turning and wait for the next train
but it will seem obvious
i smiled back when he smiled shyly at me
but other than that, I deliberately be oblivious to my surrounding and him
malu sey
i bumped into him a few times after that
both in school and in the MRT or LRT
aku buat tak nampak aje...
haha...sorry pretty boy, i stop believing in sporty handsome guys a long time ago
though sporty guys are difficult to resist
i had enough of assholes actually
dunno wad he saw in me
i am this plain girl with the huge red frame specs
this is me in cartoon drawn with illustrator
...
anyway,Sab tagged me
so here goes...
Layer 1: On the Outside
name: suhaily salleh
birth date: ...
current status: im hanging
eye color: dark brown
hair color: reddish-brown
righty or lefty: right
Layer 2: On the Inside My Heritage:
my fears: i shant say..HOHO!
my weaknesses: im too nice to people
my perfect pizza: traditional round-base pizza, bbq chicken, green bell pepper, bbq sauce, chicken floss and lotsa mozarella
Layer 3: Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow
my thoughts first waking up: bath!
my bedtime: dunno..it varies
my most missed memory: my beloved grandma
Layer 4: My Pick
pepsi or coke: i grew out of the both of them..but i will choose coke
mcdonalds or burger king: burger king please!
single or group dates: single...quality time=some time alone (hee!)
adidas or nike: adidas of course! wad the hell...
tea or nestea: wads the difference?
chocolate or vanilla: chocolate
cappuccino or coffee: they're both coffee..wad kind of choice is this??
Layer 5: Do you…
smoke: not anymore
curse: surprisingly minimal now
take a shower: duh..im a cleanliness freak
have a crush: yes of course
think you’ve been in love: define love. i dunno love.
go to school: yes...
believe in yourself: always
think you’re a health freak: ironically, im going to start my healthy regime tomorrow..hehe
Layer 6: In the past
drank alcohol: uh huh..and proudly, i quit
gone to the mall: who hasnt?
been on stage: been on stage and perform or just stand on stage..? hehe yes to both
eaten sushi: yes...but cant eat much variations..allergic to seafood
dyed your hair: never..contemplating whether i shoudld..should i?? :(
Layer 7: Have you ever…
played a stripping game: ahahaha! yes! with the guys but i was never the one who stripped..prolly because there were too many ppl playing..it was a scary game..never risk my dignity every again
Layer 8: Age you’re hoping…
to be married: yes..and the guy i wish to be married with turns out to be an asshole
Layer 9: In a guy
best eye color: doesnt matter
best hair color: natural hair colour
Layer 10: What were you doing…
a minute ago: blogging
1 hour ago: slepping
4.5 hours ago: was in lala land zzzz
1 month ago: exactly a month ago, i think i was slugging for my assignment
1 year ago: doing nothing with my life
Layer 11: Finish the sentences…
i love: myself! hehe
i feel: like shit actually
I hate: promises
I hide: my real self from other people
I miss: my grandma alot..the only person who makes me complete..but she's gone..now im incomplete
I need: some money to buy an external hard disk, a tablet and to disappear
Layer 12: Tag 5 people…
(01) mustaqimo
(02) my classmates
(03) anyone
(04) refer to (03)
(05) refer to (04)
Labels: assholes
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